I had breakfast with a dear friend today. She shared that she has noticed in the last few years that being with friends is replacing doing things with friends. And in the being there was a richer form of conversation than ever before. She wondered if it had to do with aging. And since she and I are the same age, I couldn’t really respond. Is it part of the aging process that as hit our late 50’s and early 60’s we settle down into more powerful and more intimate conversations based on our life experiences, or are we just too tired to do as much (not), or is it something women of all ages crave?
I certainly remember those teenage slumber parties where we would stay up all night talking and laughing; but I also remember those years when I was raising young children and working or going to school never having time to engage in long conversations.
Maybe we come full circle as we get older and have the time we had as teens to enter into those conversations packed with insights and discoveries. Or, maybe we have just gotten to the place where we are willing to be vulnerable again with each other. We do get to the point in our lives where we are wise enough to know that we aren’t perfect, don’t have to hide our flaws, and don’t worry about what people think of us. By 60 we have all had our share of heartaches, unwanted diagnoses, teenagers, betrayals, challenging jobs or co-workers, difficult relatives and surprises in our lives to know that rarely do we escape unscathed the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune or misfortune.
What do you think? Is there something about approaching the third stage of life that loosens our tongues and opens our minds to talking and listening on a deeper level? Or, is it a universal part of being a woman?
As she and I talked I realized that part of the time I take for myself these days includes coffee, lunch or dinner with a friend or friends. These are the energy boosters that fill me up and allow me to refresh and renew myself as we share our hearts with one another, laugh til the tears run down our cheeks and nod a silent assent to an unspoken feeling or emotion.
Whether it is an age thing or not, I know that time for myself often includes my friends. And this time when we simply get together with no other purpose than to be in each others presence is a time of gratitude and grace where I can simply say ‘aah’.
Take some time4yourself,