Feelings and Stress

I like to keep busy when I am stressed and I am stressed because I keep busy!  Anyone else on this not-so-merry-go-round?

The uncertain tends to stress me out a great deal…not knowing what is going to happen or waiting for something to happen or results makes me anxious out of my mind.  And, although I recognize it (a good thing) and can begin to do some deep breathing (another good thing), I can’t seem to prevent it from causing me stress to begin with (a not so good thing).  You would think that after all these years of not dealing well with uncertainty I could be a bit more proactive and head it off at the pass.  After all uncertainty is a given in life and most of the time I know when it is coming.

Such a conundrum.

Another conundrum happens when I get blindsided by my emotions and instead of slowing down and feeling what I am feeling, taking an inventory and processing what I am feeling, I move faster and get busier.  Thus creating stress on top of these emotions.  I don’t know about you but I find that if I try to accomplish things without dealing with my emotions I create all kinds of stress for myself.

I know that if I just stop and take some time for myself I will be much more able to cope and deal with the stressors that are now keeping me feeling tense, scared, angry, sad, overwhelmed, etc. iStock_000014942013Small However, instead of doing that I keep doing what I am doing because I don’t want to acknowledge those feelings as real and just too intimidating to handle.

Am I the only one who does this? Sigh…

Here are 3 steps I am learning to take to deal with those feelings before they become the fodder for more stress.

1.  As soon as I find myself getting short with people (a sure sign I am anxious), I stop and take 36 deep breaths.  Yes, 36.  I count each one and let my primitive brain get some good oxygen and allow myself the time to not react.

2.  After those 36 breaths I write down every emotion I am feeling – every one.  And connect those emotions to why I am anxious.  I do not sweep them under the rug in my mind and I do not rationalize them away.  I look at them directly, in the eye and find out why they are swirling in my heart and soul.

3.  Then, I let the strongest one rise to the top and deal with it.  Do I need to cry?  Do I need to go beat a pillow or take a walk?  Do I need to talk to someone?  Do I need to take an uncomfortable action?  Do I need to sleep?  Do I need to set a boundary?  Whatever it is I need to do, I do it.  No matter how scary it is.  It is amazing how much stress is released and how much energy is restored.

So that’s my plan…what’s yours?

Nancy

 

 

 

About Nancy A Leport

Nancy is a certified life coach who works with women and men who want to live by design not by default. She coaches amazing, busy, overwhelmed, and stressed people to live the life they want. She helps them get out from under the "should's" and "ought's" of everyone else's opinion to refresh, renew and recreate their bodies, minds and spirits. Isn't it time you gave yourself the gift of a de-stress coach? For more information, please call 585-943-3314
This entry was posted in Professional Women, self-care, stress reduction, Uncategorized, Women and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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